If it wasn’t for Derek Roy joining Twitter, I would never have seen this video.
Where do I even begin?
- I stopped counting the number of times he mentioned that he had plenty of places for people to crash. Between the basement mattress farm, the beds in the boathouse and the little shack out back, Roy-Z must have 25-30 available beds at any one time. Does he really have that many people over at any one time that would need to crash?” And if there are that many crashers, just how relaxing is this summer home for Mama and Papa Roy-Z? I do however, commend him for providing ample crashing space so that no one that’s been indulging would actually go out on the road and crash into something or someone. Good boy, Derek!
- I did think it was incredibly sweet that he built a master bedroom suite for his parents so they would have their own space. And I would kill for that claw foot tub in his parents’ bathroom. Then again, it wouldn’t fit in the bathroom of my apartment, but a girl can dream, right?
- Any time I see a house with a pool table in the dining room/living room area, I’m immediately reminded of General Hospital. Two of the show’s leading men – Jason Morgan and Lucky Spencer – both have pool tables in their dining rooms instead of regular tables. I don’t like when my hockey players remind me of blinky mob hitmen or weepy cops. Then again, Roy could learn a few acting tips from these two in order to more convincingly sell his “dives.” Err…penalty drawing attempts. Right. That’s what we’re calling them now.
- I’m not even sure I want to ask why one would have a steam room/shower in full view of the bedroom. On the other hand, it does show that one is completely free with one’s body to be able to be showering/steaming in full view of whomever might walk into the bedroom. (Or whomever is crashing, to use the phrase of the day.)
- I understand that Roy wanted his bed to match his decor (words I’d never thought I’d write on this blog), but speaking as someone who’s quite the klutz, that bed just screams “injury waiting to happen.” And if any co-ed naked wrestling happens there, it really could be all fun and games until someone loses an eye. (And yes, thanks to seeing that episode of “The Nanny” where Fran redecorates the kitchen, I am aware that a deer antler motif can be considered an aphrodisiac. If he is subtly trying for the aphrodisiac affect, I’m not falling for it.)
- I loved the kitchen. I guess I’m mainly jealous of the counter space & the island. My tiny kitchen just has four square feet of counter space (I measured!) and a kitchen table . It gets crazy at times when I’m trying to cook. I’d love to have all the room & space that Roy does.
- I understand that boys will need to have their toys (Exhibit A: the Ferrari and Exhibit B: the boat), but I really hope Roy is saving for his post-hockey life. Sure, his salary is a lot of money, and more than most of us will ever see in our lifetimes, but look at the increasing number of stories that we are hearing about current & former athletes who have spent through all their money. I know it’s silly for me to be concerned about a professional athlete in light of the fact that the stock market took my 401k for a ride today, but it is worth noting.
- The view of the lake and the surrounding area was gorgeous. I’d like nothing more than to curl up in one of those Adirondack chairs with a good book and a cold beverage and just relax. That area looks so peaceful.
I do have to say that this home tour was much nicer and decidedly less snarkable than the last home tour Roy-Z did. Our little star is growing up.